In our ancient Indian text, human emotions or moods were explained with “Navarasa” i.e. 9 emotions. One of the emotion is Raudra or Anger, which can lead us to unhappiness, conflict and if it gets out of control then it leads to the problem in our life or turns destructive. It doesn’t mean that we should never get angry, no…. it is normal and to an extent, it’s a normal emotion. We are human so, it is natural to be angry and have mild irritation. Ccontrol anger before it controls you.
A certain amount of anger is necessary for our survival. Expressing our angry feelings in an assertive but not aggressive manner is the healthiest way to express anger.
These days the problem is we are losing the patience because of our fast paced stressed life. Sometimes we express anger by responding aggressively. This ultimately affects our feelings and behaviors towards society or people in our contact. It becomes a problem when we can’t control our anger and it takes over us.
Sometimes constant problem starts irritating us and we start getting angry fast or some times when we are not able to communicate our emotions then also the feeling of anger takes over our other emotions.
Sometimes we don’t show our anger in loud spectacular ways but it affects us, makes us chronically irritable and grumpy. It is not necessary that easily angered people always curse and throw things, sometimes they withdraw socially, sulk, or get physically unwell.
“Never respond to an angry person with a fiery comeback,
even if he deserves it…
Don’t allow his anger to become your anger.” ― Bohdi Sanders
The important thing is we should control our anger by suppressing it and then converting or redirecting it. In the angry situations, we can hold on to our anger, stop thinking about it and focus on something positive or pleasant.
If we feel angry….. Then breathe deeply from your gut and feel the breath coming up from your gut.
Then slowly repeat words “relax,” “take it easy” inside. Take few deep breaths.
This process will change the way you think. When we are angry, our thinking can get very exaggerated and overly dramatic. The break or interruption in anger calms our nervous and we can think rationally when we are not agitated inside.
When we are calm then we can think logically as logic defeats anger, because anger even it’s justified, can quickly become irrational. So use cold hard logic on yourself.
“Do not let your anger lead to hatred,
as you will hurt yourself more than you would the other.” ― Stephen Richards
Angry people tend to jump to and act on conclusions faster and some of those conclusions can be very inaccurate. It’s natural for us to get defensive when we are criticized but it’s not wise to always fight back. Sometimes listen to what’s underlying the words, think in a peaceful manner.
Interrupt the Anger Cycle.
If another person is the source of our anger then use empathy to see the situation from his or her perspective. Be more passionate.
Learn to laugh at yourself and do not take everythControl anger before it controls you seriously. So next time when feel tempted to lash out, try to see the humor in your expressions of anger. Sometimes “Silly humor” can help defuse rage in a number of ways.
Miscommunication contributes to frustrating situations. If we listen to what someone says then it is easier to find a resolution that doesn’t involve an angry response.
Remember the difference between word “assertive” and “aggressive.”
Most important think to remember “Control anger before it controls you”.